Look to Jesus for Advice

Have you ever had a question about how to do something in your home or in your motherhood and you ran to YouTube? Maybe you ran to TikTok or maybe you ran to Instagram. Do you hurry to Google or ask AI? But, how often do you have a question about what to do and you go to your Bible and you start to pray?

This really should be the first place that we go when we have a question about what to do in life. We should look to Jesus to answer our questions. We should also point others to Jesus when answering their questions, because He has all the answers and each of our personal journeys is different. God knows what’s best for each of us.

I recently emailed a an online personality who gives advice in the area of homemaking, who I have followed for many years, by watching her videos and using some of her tips. I thanked her for the advice that she’s given me over the years and just let her know how much her guidance has helped me and it truly has. I got a reply from her that was just really short and sweet, as it should be, because we don’t know each other. She was kindly replying to me, but it felt like a quick reply to a stranger (because it was from her perspective).

But, it made me realize that I felt so close to her because I had watched her videos or and followed her advice for so many years, but she didn’t have a clue who I am. I think it was sort of a reality check that even though I felt like she was a mentor to me, she doesn’t know me. 

Online Advice is One-Sided

It made me realize that online advice is very one-sided, so we need to be careful not to put too much weight into information or advice from people that we follow online, personalities that we look up to, people that we just know from their videos, or from their advice.

We need to understand that we have a personal relationship with Jesus and He knows us and people that we see in real life they know us, but someone on the screen that’s never met you, they don’t actually know you. The relationship is one-sided. You may feel like you know them, but they don’t know you. Actually, you don’t really know them either. You just know what they present to you online. So be careful of putting too much weight into these online mentorships from people that you’ve never met in real life (me included).

Seek God with Questions

What happens when we think too highly of someone else’s opinion, such as an influencer or an online personality, and we seek their advice on everything, is that sometimes we can almost put those people in a position of an idol. We may start turning to them for advice for questions we have, instead of seeking God. When we’re constantly consuming content put out by other people, we start to compare ourselves to what they say is the right way rather than what God says. We should be getting our advice from His Word. 

Consider the Motive of the Content Creator

You also have to remember that when people are making videos online, of course they are sometimes using clickbait tactics. They are putting out content that might not be motivated solely by your best interest. Most of them are trying to make money, trying to get more clicks, and trying to get a bigger following. Some people might be on their purely being genuine, but that’s very rare, so keep that in mind.

Algorithms Feed Insecurities

Of course, we also know that the algorithms on these platforms are set up to feed our insecurities. They keep giving us more of whatever we are stressing about, so you have to be careful not to let yourself get drawn into this. That is why it’s good to not make it be your first line of advice.

Instead, first, we should pray about whatever it is. See what the word of the God has to say about it, and then seek out mentorship for someone in your real life. Think of Christian moms that you actually know, this may be your mom, your sister, your aunt, or a church friend. Try to make connections and community with people that you see in real life.

Fixing a Problem You Didn’t Know You Had

Sometimes when we are on social media or these platforms that are all full of advice – AKA- sales pitches, we start thinking we have a problem we don’t even have. Maybe you just got your clothes sorted out a way you like or your pantry has worked well for you for years the way you’ve always done it, but this person you like and follow online just put out a new video about pantry organization. Now all of a sudden instead of being content, you’re all worried about having to fix it, because it’s suddenly not good enough.

Most of the time, when we watch these videos, we don’t even implement the advice. We just be up feeling worse about how we were doing things already if we were not careful. 

Wisdom

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.

James 1:5

Convincing You of Your Problem and Offering a Solution

The whole idea with sales is to make you realize your problem and then offer you a solution. The video is a sales tactic designed to make you watch to the end, which gets the creator more views, more follows, and they hope it leads to more money in their pockets. So just keep that in mind, don’t think there is something wrong with you that needs to be fixed on every video you watch.

Don’t let yourself be set up and compared to some standard of perfection created by people who profit by you feeling like you need to fix yourself. It’s not to say that they have bad intentions, it’s just that with the algorithms feeding you whatever you search for, it can create this loop where your own insecurities get magnified. So I’m telling you to be aware, and limit your online consumption. Seek God when you have a question and seek advice from people in your real life.

Seek Advice from Older Christian Women

So, speaking of seeking advice in real life when we look at Titus chapter 2, what I named my blog “Titus Mom” after, we know that women are called to be keepers at home. The Bible tells us in Titus 2, the older women are supposed to mentor the younger women and teach them about these things. If there is a Christian woman in your life who has experience being a homemaker, that might be a good person to turn to for advice.

Your role is to love your husband and your children and to keep your home. Prioritize being at home to give the best care to your husband and children. Staying at home is not inferior to working outside the home. That’s a lie from the enemy. Home is a beautiful and wonderful place to be.

Always Turn to God for Encouragement and Don’t Make Idols of People

My goal with this blog is to encourage stay at home moms and to be a Titus mom that encourages other moms that are younger than me. Also, I appreciate advice from Christian moms that are older than me. My goal is to share tips that help women, but I never want to be some sort of an idol or example that people find unattainable or anything like that. I think each of us needs to seek God and do our best to follow what He says in His word for us to do. I think Titus 2 gives some really good examples, along with other Scripture, of what we are supposed to do as women.

I just want to encourage people with what I’ve learned along the way. I definitely am not the ultimate authority. God is and always will be the ultimate authority and He is who we should turn to first, when we have questions or concerns or anything we want to talk about. 

God is always there for us and we can pray continually. We can pray in any moment. We don’t have to be in any certain spot our way, He is always there. So, we should always turn to Him first. 

Take Advice from Those Who Are Doing What You Want to be Doing

With that being said, anybody that you do listen to, make sure the person is doing what you want to be doing. For example if you want to be a Christian, godly Homemaker, look for Christian, godly homemakers for advice. Make sure that any advice you receive is in alignment with God’s word. Pray about decisions that you make in your own life. Ask God to guide you in your decisions and to keep you in alignment with His will for you.

Seek God First

So again, anytime that you have a question or concern, my advice would be to go to God first seek God‘s word. The Bible tells us that if any lack wisdom, just pray and He will give it to you. God will give it to you, so just pray for it. Ask Him to guide you and lead you. Ask Him every morning to help you through the day and guide you to do His will.

There is nothing wrong with watching videos for a recipe or a tip, but just keep it in its proper place. Never place any one influence or a personality as some huge part of shaping who you are, because that’s what you should be seeking God for and anything else is just bonus, like a tip. 

Don’t idolize these people. Be careful not to become too attached to a creator and think they’re like your best friend when they don’t know your name. They don’t even know who you are and if they saw you in person, they would not recognize you from a stranger. Don’t overvalue someone like that in your own head. Recognize that the videos, blog posts, and everything is a marketplace. They’re trying to sell you something, so they’re going to try to highlight a pain point and then give you a solution. Sometimes, like I said, you may not even have a real issue, but they sort of create one, so be careful with this. 

Maybe this exact post is not even an issue for you. Maybe you don’t even watch online videos when you have a question, but if if it applies to you, use it. It is the same for other content, if it applies to you, use it, but don’t start thinking you have problems you don’t even have. Be careful about that. Build up your life relationships and your actual home and don’t spend too much time in the online world.

Social Media Is Unnecessary

Finally, I like to think about my grandmother who had 10 kids before the time of social media and YouTube and she raised her kids without any of their advice and she did just fine. But do you know what she did have? She had a church community and she had family and friends to help, to talk to, and to ask for advice. She had God and she had people in her life that were godly, loving people, and that’s what matters. Most importantly, she had God and she had God‘s Word. My grandma loved her family and she showed it.

The most important thing we can do is teach our kids about Jesus, love our husbands, love our children, and ask the Lord to lead us and trust Him with the rest. We don’t have to stress about meeting some standard of perfection from people on the internet. We just need to please God, doing our best to do what He has called us to do. 

Study the Bible and Apply it to Your Life

Familiarize yourself with the verses in the Bible that talk to women about what they’re supposed to do. Study those and pray for the Holy Spirit to guide and show you how those apply to your life and your situation. Love God, love your husband, love your babies, and be a Titus mom. If there is someone younger than you that you can help and give advice to in real life, do that. If there’s someone older than you, that might have some wisdom to share, try to connect with them. Let’s build real life community and always look to Jesus.