Putting Others First as a Homemaker

We all have a natural tendency to be selfish. It is easy and effortless to go around all day doing what you want, to further your own cause, or to simply make yourself happy in the moment. However let’s consider these Bible verses:

“Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.”

Philippians‬ ‭2‬:‭3‬-‭4‬ ‭ESV‬‬

I have read this many times and usually, I think of it in a general way. Like “others” is referring to just all people other than myself. But recently, I read it, and it hit me, that the most relevant way for me to think of this and apply it daily is to think of the “others” as those in my household. This would specifically be my husband and my children. With this in mind, I began to make two lists:

• What does my husband need?
• What do my children need?

List #1: What does your husband need?

• Respect
• Love
• Clean/orderly home
• Healthy food
• Doctor’s appointments/medicine
• Clean Laundry
• Time to relax

List #2: What do your children need?

• To be heard, cared for, and loved
• Healthy, quality food
• A clean, welcoming home
• A quality homeschool education
• Fun/educational experiences
• Clean clothes/shoes that fit

How can you be sure to spend quality time with everyone?

When you child wants to talk or play, take time to do it. It may feel like you have a million things to do, but spending time with them is really the most important work. Connect with all of your family members one on one and in groups.

Plan fun, educational trips to take that don’t cost much. You can find local spots that are free like parks or natural things to explore like waterfalls, lakes, trails, or beaches. You can also find seasonal activities at farms, zoos, or museums. There are lots of ways to get out and have fun as a family. You can play board games together if you want to be home. Sports, music, and art together are also fun. Try to keep learning new things together.

How can you keep the home clean?

Get in the habit of keeping a clean home. For years, I’ve been loosely following Fly Lady. I say loosely because I’m not a stickler, but I do try to keep the routines in mind. Fly Lady always says that you need to do baby steps. This is because baby steps help you create habits that stick, instead of going all in to the point that you wear yourself out and then just totally quit.

Use Checklists

I love that now Fly Lady has an app, and you can check off your routines that way each day. You can also customize them. If you don’t want to be in a screen, which I totally understand, you can also print them out. You can laminate them and use a dry erase marker to check things off of that helps. Or you can take the most important routines that you need help remembering to do each day, and put them on a marker board on the fridge with boxes that you check off each day. Make it easier for yourself to be successful.

Delegate Household Tasks

You can also delegate some of these things to the kids. It’s important to model for them how to properly do these things. Delegating these does not make you a bad mom. It’s actually the opposite. It’s good to teach your kids how to do these basic household tasks and it teaches them responsibility as part of the household. Good things to delegate:

• Dishes
• Laundry tasks
• Trash
• Wiping down counters
• Sweeping
• Vacuuming
• Tidying

How can you keep your spending reasonable while getting everyone what they need?

Find a way that works well for you to track your spending. Give yourself goals, limits, or guidelines to help you have an idea of how you’re going to manage your money. Have an agreement with your husband about how to manage it. Some people prefer a more strict budget, and some prefer a more laid back one. Make sure that you’re making progress toward your goals and paying for today with today’s money, not borrowing from your future self.

How can you protect and promote health in your home?

Be intentional about how you spend your time. Model good habits for your kids and your husband. Encourage everyone to make healthy choices with food, movement, and more.

• Keep up with appointments as needed for everyone
• Provide healthy food options and educate your kids on how to make healthy choices
• Create opportunities for movement and exercise that are fun and encourage your kids to be active

How can you provide a quality homeschool education?

Give your full attention and best effort. Consider the most important things you want to teach your children. Think big picture and smaller picture. Like what do you want them to learn overall as far as attitudes about life and learning? But also, what do they need to learn this year, specifically? What is most important?

Give yourself grace. You won’t be able to do everything ever, so choose what matters most. Let it be fun.

How can you have healthy food readily available?

One idea is to take photos of healthy meals that you make. You can save these in an album on your phone and revisit the album when you need help coming up with new ideas. You’ll build this up over time and it’s a way to have a custom list of things your family likes.

How can you care for yourself to stay energetic and on task?

Think of your basic needs. When you care for a baby, you make sure they are fed, they get sleep, they get a bath, they get time to play, time outside, etc.

Do the same for yourself. Make sure you have sleep. Make sure you feed yourself healthy, nourishing food. Spend time outside, in the sunshine.

When you take care of yourself, you’ll have more energy and excitement to take care of other tasks and other people too.

Serve with Humility

Serve others with love and humility. In serving them, you’ll strengthen your relationships and may even find yourself with a smile as you find joy in putting others first.