Being a Homemaker, A Great Choice
Staying home as a wife or mom seems to have a lot of titles lately. People call it being a “trad wife” (traditional wife), being a stay at home wife, a stay at home mom, or in the older way of saying it, a “homemaker.” Are you choosing to be a homemaker or any of these above titles? Being a homemaker is a great choice.
Default for all of humanity, now suddenly not enough?
Whatever you call it, being a homemaker is a choice that used to be the default and has since become one that many women feel pressured not to choose. It seems the general consensus is that you must grow up, go to college, aim for some career goal, and impress everyone with your great accomplishments.
Your Greatest Accomplishments
But what if your greatest accomplishments aren’t on the other side of some degree or a promotion, a job title, or recognition. What if your greatest accomplishments are neglected as you chase worldly recognition. What if the lies of feminism have robbed you of what your grandmothers had without you even realizing it?
A Career Isn’t a Must
I am here to tell you young women, you don’t have to have a career. You don’t have to go to college. You can seek to humbly serve your family. If possible, live with your parents until you marry. Then stay home and serve your husband and your children.
Homemaking is Fun and Fulfilling
Do all of those things that you find fun: decorating, party planning, crafts, cooking, sewing, gardening, loving on your babies, taking them on trips, educating them, and keeping your home. It is an amazing blessing, not a waste. It’s quite the opposite. It is immensely fulfilling. Love your husband. Love your children. Humbly serve in your home.
Your talents aren’t being wasted, you’re right where you need to be
When you choose to stay home and serve those in your household, your talents aren’t being wasted. You’re right where you need to be.
The Work/Service/Love of the Home Matters
Homemaking is a calling.
When you continue to pour yourself out through cooking and cleaning and serving you’re not doing work that’s meaningless or basic or unimportant. The work that you are doing matters, We are called to love one another. Jesus tells us time and time again to love one another. One way to do that is by putting others first as a homemaker.
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.
John 13:34-35
That’s how the world will know that we are his disciples when we love one another. Understand that in motherhood and in homemaking, love is shown in so many ways. You also can think through the things that you need to do each day and develop routines for yourself to help you stay on top of what needs to get done.
Serving doesn’t mean that you’re incapable of more than service. It is a privilege to be a homemaker. It’s a privilege to obey God by loving one another. We show our love for those closest to us daily, as we serve them in our home.
Set a Good Example for Your Children
When we are doing what Jesus said and we’re showing love to each other, we’re giving a good example to our children and to everyone around us on how to truly love each other. We’re showing them that we are a true followers of Jesus, because we serve. We don’t serve with a bad attitude, we serve with humility. Jesus taught us with his example. If we want to teach our children, we need to show them with our example of following Him. We can’t do this without Him.
Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.
John 15:4
It is when we abide in Him that we will bear much fruit. So, it all is founded in Him. Grow the depth of your own roots by prioritizing daily prayer and time in God’s word. When God‘s word is in us, it’s going to show by the way we behave.
Stay in Prayer
The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.
Psalm 145:18
When you go to Him for daily prayer, I recommend a place where you can be alone with Him, even if just for a few moments, and SINCERELY call out to Him. Seek His guidance always. As you see in the verse above, the LORD is near to all who call on him in truth. When you mean it, He knows, and He will be there. You’re not alone. He’s there, so seek Him always- for the small stuff, the big stuff, all of it.
Don’t Let Your Old Ideas Hold You Back
If you are a woman who has not yet chosen to become a homemaker because it doesn’t match what you previously thought you were going to do, I’m asking you to reassess. Think about what is actually most important to you. What is going to matter in 20 years? In 30 years?
Are you choosing not to be a homemaker because you’re worried about what other people will think? Are you choosing not to be a homemaker because it doesn’t match the idea you had when you signed up for college? Are you choosing not to be a homemaker because you’re prioritizing your career or your own ambition above raising your children, the way that you need to, to protect them from things of this world? How can you truly know what they’re being taught if you’re outsourcing their education to someone else? How do you expect to have a strong bond with them if you only see them for a few hours a day, while someone else spends the bulk of the time with them?
Even the “Small” Things Matter
If you are a homemaker, don’t think that the daily tasks are unimportant. Like Fly Lady says, “Nothing says, ‘I love you,’ like clean underwear.” I say that with a smile, but we all know what it’s like to get to the end of the drawer and realize you don’t have any, and it’s not fun. So serve with a smile and don’t feel like you have to do more and more and more.
What you are doing is more than just clean underwear or a meal on the table or clean floors, which most of us probably don’t have, ha ha. You are there for your children. You are there for your spouse. Think about a grandmother or a great grandmother that you admired. It’s likely that you’re thinking of someone that was home and when you went to their house, what did it feel like? Did you feel at home? Did you feel welcomed? So that’s what we’re going for- love in the home- not perfection.
You Don’t Have to Be Perfect, Just Serve with LOVE
People do this differently too. I think the love and the home is the most important thing. It’s not about money and it’s not about decorations. It’s not about perfect cleanliness or chores or Pinterest worthy stuff up on the walls. Our grandmas didn’t have Pinterest.
What my grandmas did have was love. My grandmothers loved Jesus. You felt that love when you walked through the door. They fed you. They talked to you. They cared about what was going on with you. They gave you gifts, kisses, and hugs. They taught you about Jesus.
Don’t Worry About What People Think, Just teach your Kids about Jesus
When you’re trying to figure out what you’re going to do or who you want to be, be the woman who leads people to Jesus. Be the mother that your kids remember and think of love. Stop worrying about what people think. Stop worrying about what you thought you were going to do in some career. None of that matters.
What matters is that you teach your kids about Jesus, that you show them love day in and day out, that you’re a loving kind and submissive wife to your husband, and that you are following Jesus, that’s number one.
Be Kind to Yourself
Don’t beat yourself up though if there are days when all your accomplishing is getting the laundry done, or less. Make sure that you’re showing love. Make sure that you’re feeding your kids and know that you’re not going to be perfect, but you’re there when you choose to be a homemaker. Know this: homes don’t make themselves. A house without the presence of a homemaker is just boards and insulation.
If You are Working Toward Staying Home, PRAY About It
If you are in a situation where you want to stay home, and it feels like it is not an option, PRAY. Seek the Lord about it and ask Him to guide you and to make it possible. Check out my post, “10 Tips to Live on One Income and Become a Stay at Home Mom.” Also, know that many times, making the choice to stay home requires you prioritizing it. You may have to make some big changes to make it happen. You may need to quit an already successful career, sell a car, or move to a less expensive area. Whatever it is, it’s not too big for God to solve, so take it to Him in prayer and trust Him.
“and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.
Titus 2:4-5
Choose to be a Homemaker
So choose to be a homemaker. Do it well. Do it as unto the Lord and with His guidance. Call on Him in truth and He will meet you there. Being a homemaker is a great choice, choose it!
